


the ultimate pizza

by watergator



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Come Eating, Food Kink, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-22 22:07:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23434456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watergator/pseuds/watergator
Summary: sex and pizza
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 17
Kudos: 79





	the ultimate pizza

“Phil.”

His voice is swallowed by hungry lips, eating down his words, along with the soft moan that escape him.

His back arches, and grabby hands pull at his waist. They’re flushed, chest to chest. Dan doesn’t think they can be any more closer, until Phil’s hands are scooting under his ass, hoisting him up a little.

It’s all the direction he needs when he lifts his hips and wraps his legs around Phil’s middle.

It’s a bit of a tricky angle, especially when they’re both over six feet tall  _ and  _ crammed onto one small soft which, technically, isn't actually theirs.

But Dan’s not thinking about what their landlord would think if he knew what they were doing to his furniture.

Dan’s thinking of what they’re  _ about  _ to do on this furniture.

Phil’s lips are attached to his neck, sucking and kissing and slurping all over the place.

When it comes to making out like this, Phil doesn’t really have any rules. He doesn’t have a guide or a moment to think - he just does.

And when his lips press against Dan’s pulse and kisses him there, he doesn’t seem to mind.

Their hips clash once again and laziness aside, Dan really does want to get naked already.

“Fucking,” Dan starts, but he stops. His words float away from him when Phil crawls up a notch and kisses him, square on the mouth.

When they break away for air, he finds the sentence again with a huff.

“Fucking... take off my clothes. Take off  _ your _ clothes. Just take everything off.”

Phil’s lips are wet when Dan looks at them, glistened with spit. His eyes are hooded and glossy, almost like he’s been taken over my lust, and his cheeks are a pinky colour that adds on to the look of arousal.

“What, like now?” Phil asks between a giggle.    
  
It can’t be actually possible for someone to be so cute and hot at the same time.   
  
But Phil Lester does seem to defy science multiple times.   
  
Dan lets a breath escape him, a whisper of a moan that only makes Phil giggle again.   
  
Dan wiggles his hips, trying to grind on him as best he can, to make sure he’s focusing up on what they intended to happen.

But Phil’s kissing him opened mouthed, when he laughs again, and it seems he doesn’t want to, or can, stop.

He falls on top of Dan, crushing his body with his in an unsexy way, and the top of his head is tucked under Dan’s chin. When he laughs again, he feels it vibrate through his chest.

“What’s so funny?” Dan asks, his hand sneaks up the back of his shirt as his fingers dance across the naked skin there.

Phil looks up at him, pulling himself up so he’s half a centimetre away from his face. His breath brushes past Dan’s face and it smells like mint. 

“It’s just that, if you get naked now, one of us is gonna have to get the pizza,” he tells him with a wonky grin.

Dan had honestly forgotten about their food.

“And I’m just imagining what poor Zac Efron Pizza Man would think if we opened the door butt naked.”

Dan does laugh at that. Zac Efron Pizza Man had become a regular when it came to delivering the massive amount of pizza’s they ordered to their home.

Dan feels his lips curl into a smile. “Don’t you think he’d be into it?” He asks him. “Invite him in maybe?”   
  
The whole situation would be very over the top porn type, but it still makes Dan laugh.   
  
Phil snorts.    
  
“Nuh uh,” he says with a shake of his head. “His chin is too square,” he tells him. “Completely het.”   
  
Dan balks before he’s letting out a spluttered laugh. “What?” He says between a high pitched giggle. “What about your chin makes you  _ straight? _ ”   
  
Phil lifts himself off Dan and cocks his head. “Just is. He has a straight boy’s chin.”   
  
Dan grins. “What, opposed to  _ my  _ gay boy chin?”   
  
Phil leans in slow, eyes hooded and the corners of his mouth twitch into a small smile. He sucks in a sharp breath before he closes the gap between them, pressing his lips against his.   
  
It’s so hot and good, Dan’s mouth parts and lets Phil’s tongue slide past his lips, licking the inside of his mouth with one fatal flick.   
  
Phil pulls away and Dan feels his breath hitch when he watches the line of spit that’s shared between them. Phil smirks as he swipes his lip along his bottom lip, lapping it up.

“Difference is, you’ll be the one wiping yours later on,” Phil whispers in a low voice.   
  
Dan can’t even form words, and whilst his brain is still figuring it out, the doorbell rings.   
  
Phil looks at him again, a grin stretched across his face as he pulls himself up off Dan and off the sofa.   
  
He stands, reaches down to grab to sort himself out, all whilst Dan just watches.

“Still wanna invite Zac in?” Phil teases before he turns and he leaves.   
  
Dan’s still hard in his pants, straining against the restrictive material of his jeans. He hears Phil’s feet go down the stairs like they have a million times. Usually he’d be excited about his dinner, but right now he really doesn’t care for his pizza.   
  
He’s as hard as a rock and all he wants is Phil.   
  
The door opens, there’s the sound of muffled voices, and Dan tries to imagine what kind of awkward small talk Phil is attempting, all whilst he’s half hard. The door closes and the footsteps return, coming closer to where he’s still just laying flat out on the sofa.   
  
Phil’s amused face comes into vision. The pizza box is balanced in his hand, whilst the other has the coke bottle.   
  
“Are you getting up?” Phil asks him casually.   
  
It’s almost as if he’s just going to pretend what just happened, never happened.   
  
And Dan’s not gonna let him get away with that. He’s not a patient person in any circumstance, and right now, when it comes down to sex and Phil, he really,  _ really _ , isn’t patient.

“Are you gonna fuck me first?” Dan asks. He pitches his voice low, knowing how Phil likes it when it goes all gravely.

He watches Phil’s throat bob as he swallows. “You don’t wanna eat first?” He asks back, holding the pizza box a little higher until it starts to wobble off his palm.

“Fuck,” Dan tells him. “Then eat.”   
  
Phil grins. “It’ll get cold,” he whispers.   
  
“We’ll stay hot.”   
  
Phil’s smiling ear to ear, clearly enjoying all of this.   
  
“Need to get your stamina up though, babe,” he says, feigning innocence with a bat of his lashes.   
  
He spins around, bending over to place to box and bottle down. His ass just so happens to be right where Dan’s face is.   
  
Dan isn’t a patient person, nor is he restrained when it comes to Phil and his ass. He reaches over and grabs it, giving one cheek an as good as he can squish, making Phil turn back around.   
  
He has a smile on his face and when he turns around out of Dan’s reach, he has a slice of pizza already in his hand. The toppings slide over the edge where it hangs off his fingers, sauce dots the skin there, and whilst still being hungry for just Phil, Dan licks his lips at the sight of it.   
  
“Hungry?” Phil asks.   
  
Dan just nods before he’s shuffling up so he can sit up properly.   
  
Phil moves towards him, straddling his lap with such ease it’s like it’s second nature to him at this point.   
  
The pizza slice is still flopped over in his hand, fingers stained, and all Dan wants to do is suck them, one by one into his mouth, letting the salty mixture of the pizza and Phil’s natural scent explode in his mouth.   
  
He doesn’t realise he’s been staring until there’s a hand at his hip, giving it a little squeeze, bringing him back to earth.   
  
“You wanna taste, baby?”   
  
Phil’s bottom lip is full, jutted out. His eyes are big and round, and Dan feels him salivate at the sight of him like this; this innocent game he’s playing.   
  
“Please,” Dan rasps.   
  
Phil lifts the slice and brings it to his lips, he can taste it now - the same pizza they always get, but now it’s like it’s a thousand times more intense. The barbeque tang almost burns his lip.   
  
“Open,” Phil whispers. Their gazes are locked on one another and Dan opens his mouth enough to let the slice slide right into his mouth.   
  
“Bite,” Phil instructs, and Dan does. The flavour bursts on his tongue.   
  
Half the pizza is now sat in his mouth, the rest is still drooping in Phil’s hand, all flaccid and wet looking.

“Chew,” is Phil’s next instruction. 

Dan does as he’s told. His eyes never leave Phil’s; staring into the deep swirling of blue that has him transfixed on everything he does.

He chews until the food in his mouth is a wet sludge. He grinds his teeth together and doesn’t take his eyes off the man in front of him.

Phil sucks in a short breath. He shifts his hips forward a little, and it’s clear that they’re both still enjoying it, even if they are still clad in their restrictive jeans.

“Now… swallow.”

It’s not the words Dan usually finds coming out of Phil’s mouth in instances like this. When it comes to sex, he’s not a lover of the taste of someone’s orgasm. He’d much prefer to take it on the chin, quite literally, than swallow come.

But pizza is different. Pizza, Dan can handle.

He does as he’s told once again, and is sure to exaggerate the gulping sound he makes, just to get a reaction out of Phil.

His lips purse, his hips shift again, and he’s sucking in a steady breath.

“Good boy,” he croaks. “Now, open up for me.”

Dan lets his mouth hang open as Phil takes the other half of the pizza slice, and manages to fit it into his gob.

“Such a big mouth,” Phil comments, pushing the crust in past his lips. “Such a big, lovely mouth.”

Dan waits, cheeks stuffed as he watches Phil.

He licks his lips, eyes dart up and down where he’s sat, and he nods.

“Swallow it.”

Dan chews first, the crunch of the crust is loud, the peppers burst on his tongue, the cheese melts away inside his mouth.

Everything feels so alive and intense. He’s so caught up in how good the pizza is, he doesn’t notice the hand that’s trailed up under his shirt.

He shivers at the touch as fingers ghost over his skin.

Dan finally swallows the food and takes a breath.

“Taste good?” Phil asks.

Dan nods. “Fucking delicious.”

Phil grins, like he’s proper proud of himself.

Dan’s eyes pull away from Phil back at the box behind him.

“D’you want me to feed you some?” He asks.

Phil shakes his head. “No,” he tells him. His hand trails up at his chest, fingers tug at his nipples before he retracts it.

“I have something else for you.”

Dan gulps, a proper gulp this time, nothing exaggerated or comical, because Phil’s hand leaves his body, and instead reaches down to unzip his own jeans.

He has to stand to get them off, even if he gives up halfway through and settles for where they’re pulled down midway his shins.

Dan’s eyes are focused on the cock in front of him - at least, it would be in front of him if it weren’t for the thinly stretched boxer shorts that were separating them.

The shape of his bulge is prominent, and there’s even a visible damp spot where his cock head strains against the material.

Phil looks down at himself, then back up at Dan.

“You wanna taste?” He asks, voice still laced with foreign innocence, and Dan just nods.

Phil doesn’t hesitate to reach down and pull himself out.

His cock pings out of its confinement, slapping against his bare belly skin where his T-shirt has rucked up.

Dan feels his mouth grow wet and his dick even harder at the sight of it.

“You gonna suck me?” Phil asks. His hand comes down to wrap around himself, giving it a few long, slow strokes.

Dan nods again.

“Lay down,” Phil instructs him, pushing him down with a hand on his chest. 

The angle isn’t perfect, but it works. Phil crawls over his horizontal body until the tip of his dick is brushing past his lips.

Dan whines and Phil just taps the head of his cock on his nose.

“Greedy,” he comments, and Dan purses his lips together. 

He wants this. He  _ needs  _ this. 

“Phil,” he whispers, voice so quiet it might as well have been a wisp of wind passing by.

But Phil looks down at him, towering above him, cock almost blocking out the view of his face, when Dan opens his mouth, and nods.

He takes Phil into his mouth, sucking on the tip. He feels the bubble of precome on his tongue, lapping it up, slurping and sucking like it’s his favourite treat.

All while Phil groans and moans on top of him.

It ends up with Phil bending over Dan’s head, hands gripping the sofa arms, angling himself to be able to slip and fuck right into his mouth.

Dan’s hands come up to cup his ass, roaming around until one hand finds his balls and gives them a delicate tug.

The room is filled with all kinds of incoherent noises; slurps and gurgles and moans and grunts.

Phil slows down his hips and Dan lets his cock slip out of his mouth with a wet pop.

It glistens with spit, and Dan brushes his nose against it rather lovingly, like it were a pet.

“How do I taste?” Phil asks with a heaving breath.

Dan swallows thickly. “So good,” he whimpers. “I can taste you, the pizza; it’s so delicious.”

Phil looks down at him and grins almost devilishly.

“I have an idea,” he tells him.

Dan pouts. “I’m so hard.”

“I know,” Phil sighs, carefully crawling back off Dan. 

He watches as he moves carefully off the sofa, his dick waggles in front of him, bending back over the table, this time where Dan can have a proper look.

However, he doesn’t have time to have another grope, or to even keep staring, because Phil turns back around, this time, with another slice of pizza in his hand.

Dan pulls himself up onto his elbows.

“Want me to keep eating?” He asks, a curve of his brows as he waits for Phil's response.

But Phil just shakes his head, lips still tugging into a cat-like grin.

“Not yet,” he tells him as he sits back onto the sofa. He walks back over to Dan on his knees, a little shorter this time so Dan can’t reach his dick.

“Wanna have you taste me too,” Phil says, a slight whine to his voice. He reaches with his free hand and tugs at himself. He cracks open his eyes to look back at Dan.

“Want to you to taste it together.”

The idea is absolutely absurd. In fact, it’s almost laughable, at the idea of…  _ defiling  _ a pizza slice in the name of sex.

But right now, with a pizza slice in one hand, and his dick in the other, Dan can’t argue that it’s not incredibly hot.

He’ll maybe poke fun later when they’re tucked up in bed and talking over what really happened tonight, but right now, he really wants a taste of Phil and that pizza.

Phil’s wanking himself with purpose now. He was on the edge when Dan had him in his mouth, he could tell.

And right now, from the way his dick is twitching, plump in his hand and a deep purple at the head, Dan knows he isn’t going to last long.

“Open your mouth,” Phil mutters through gritted teeth. “Gonna come.”

Dan once again, follows the instructions. He lets his jaw hang loose and he sticks out his tongue, letting it lay flat.

Phil grunts and moans and whispers words that Dan isn’t paying attention too. He’s watching intently the way his dick moves and jumps, and the pulse that runs up the side of it thumps and squeezes.

“Ah!” Phil cries out, then another, and another.

“Ah, ah, ah!”

He comes. Thick white streams of it burst from his tip, flying from him with such beauty that Dan almost forgets he’s supposed to be trying to catch at least some of it in his mouth.

It doesn’t matter though, because Phil comes, and he comes hard. It gets everywhere. It lands on his cheek, drips off his nose, and when Dan opens his eyes, he notices that a large puddle of it has landed over the pizza.

Phil’s still touching himself, coming down from the aftershock of it all. His dick gives another violent twitch as more come dribbles out of his cock, dripping down his knuckles and down his wrist.

His chest heaves and his head is tilted back as he tries to compose himself.

When he looks up again at Dan, his eyes are all glossy and his face is completely flushed.

Dan smiles at him, and Phil automatically smiles back.

He drops his cock, letting it land softly onto Dan’s stomach when Phil looks down and notices the pizza still in his hand.

“Do you—“

Dan doesn’t even need to be asked once, let alone twice.

He’s able to scoot up from underneath Phil before his hand grabs Phil’s wrist and he guides the food towards his mouth.

Phil gulps, hard, as he watches intently to what’s happening. 

Dan opens his mouth and takes a bite.

He chews and chews and then, finally, he swallows.

Phil blinks at him. He might even get hard again from the look in his eyes.

“Good?” Phil asks, voice raspy.

Dan smirks, swiping a finger over the come/sauce that’s been left in the corner of his lips. He pops it into his mouth and sucks, letting it go once it’s all gone.

Dan’s still hard as rock and they have a whole pizza to finish. He gulps and nods, 

“Fucking delicious.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank u to the anons over on tumblr that enabled me to write this :')
> 
> this is a no kink-shaming zone bitch!
> 
> come say hi on tumblr !! @watergator


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